When Seth Walsh was in the sixth grade, he turned to his mother one day and told her he had something to say.
“I was folding clothes, and he said, ‘Mom, I’m gay,’ ” said Wendy Walsh, a hairstylist and single mother of four. “I said, ‘O.K., sweetheart, I love you no matter what.’ ”
But last month, Seth went into the backyard of his home in the desert town of Tehachapi, Calif., and hanged himself, apparently unable to bear a relentless barrage of taunting, bullying and other abuse at the hands of his peers. After a little more than a week on life support, he died last Tuesday. He was 13.
The case of Tyler Clementi, the Rutgers University freshman who jumped off the George Washington Bridge after a sexual encounter with another man was broadcast online, has shocked many. But his death is just one of several suicides in recent weeks by young gay teenagers who had been harassed by classmates, both in person and online.
The list includes Billy Lucas, a 15-year-old from Greensburg, Ind., who hanged himself on Sept. 9 after what classmates reportedly called a constant stream of invective against him at school.
Less than two weeks later, Asher Brown, a 13-year-old from the Houston suburbs, shot himself after coming out. He, too, had reported being taunted at his middle school, according to The Houston Chronicle. His family has blamed school officials as failing to take action after they complained, something the school district has denied.
The deaths have set off an impassioned — and sometimes angry — response from gay activists and caught the attention of federal officials, including Secretary of Education Arne Duncan, who on Friday called the suicides “unnecessary tragedies” brought on by “the trauma of being bullied.”
“This is a moment where every one of us — parents, teachers, students, elected officials and all people of conscience — needs to stand up and speak out against intolerance in all its forms,” Mr. Duncan said.
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I taught high school from 1984 to 1994 and I saw up close the toll that bullying took on students. Often the targeted students were or perceived to be LGBT. It was appalling the number of teachers and administrators who looked the other way and would not intervene. Some of them actually shared the attitudes of the bullies. As the administration would not act, a small group of teachers and guidance counselors go together with students and formed a support group fo the victims of bullying. We also made our presence known in the hallways and restrooms where a lot of the abuse took place. We also created an anti-bullying workshop and persuaded the administration that any student caught bullying had to attend our workshop.
ReplyDeleteI left teaching to attend law school. I've devoted my legal career to working on issues in public education including getting anti-bullying legislation passed. In 2009, our state legislature finally passed an anti-bullying bill that included protections for students bullied based on their actual or perceived LGBT status.
It hasn't been a magic bullet, but it has pulled the issue of bullying out into the light of day where we have to deal with it. Something can be done, and schools and communities have to stop pretending that they don't see the problem. Too many young people feel alone and hurt, and cannot see that there is any light at the end of their tunnel of pain.
Sorry to have gone on for so long, but this is a matter close to my heart.