I'll make this as short as I can.
Unlike other writers, I have a problem with putting my business out there. I believe in certain elements of privacy, so I tend not to give details about my life as way to bind myself to the readers.
But . . .
Some of you may have - or may have not noticed - that I am not posting as regularly as I used to. It's been deliberate on my part. There have been some changes. As a lot of you know, my mother passed last year. She was my heart and soul and things in my world just isn't the same without her. It hasn't been easy dealing with it. It continues to be something which I can't put into words. . .
Subsequently, this has affected my mindset about things. I'm a bit angrier, harsher, and somewhat more cynical. My threshold for politeness has been steadily receding and my outlook is a bit grimmer.
Granted, I still believe in the equality of LGBTQ people, and I know that no matter how difficult things get, we will win like we've always had in the past. But these days, I acknowledge how darker the roads are getting with the rise of social media wannabe superstars instigating crap against our community with their rage tweets and lies. Not to mention rise of attacks on our culture, the pushing of anti-LGBTQ legislation. or the attacks from within our community (the "LGB without the Q and T" and "Gays Against Groomers" astroturfed bullshit) all backed by dark money.
Mentally, while I am as ready to fight as I have always been, I have to acknowledge that I'm getting older and more measured with the things I say and do on this blog. I'm probably not going to post as much, but I will be posting steadily. Also, I probably won't be as nice as I was in the past. When it comes to anti-LGBTQ lies and such, the reality is now no matter how much proof you put out there refuting them, there will always be an element of folks ignoring it.
And sometimes exposure alone don't mean shit.
So, if you have read this far, here what to expect from this blog in the future - steady commentary but with a little less posting. And above all, I'm going to be less polite in how I categorize certain people and groups.
Because they deserve it.
Behind you 100%, Alvin. Take care of yourself, including by allowing yourself to be real, direct and raw as necessary.
ReplyDeleteAlvin-
ReplyDeleteMy sincere condolences on losing your mother. There are no words that can make everything better. I wonder if you have worked with a grief counselor. They can be very helpful in getting through this loss that all of us have faced/are facing/may be facing. As for being harsher in your posts, whoever could fault you? The trolls are out like armies of Orcs, and we need to accept the fact that the ‘gloves are off’. Of course, the percentage of damaged people posting here does not mirror the percentage of people who hate us in the population as whole. We need to keep reminding ourselves that here on X we are encountering a small portion of our fellow Americans, but the social media platform amplifies their voices way beyond their importance.
I’m happy you will still be here, ‘posting when irritated’! I hope you eventually reach the clearing in your life where your happy memories of your mother prevail over the moments of her passing. All my best to you.
Ray