Deerfield High School 'Confidentiality Agreement': How the anti-gay industry distorts reality

In my last post, I talked about the Deerfield High School controversy (see last post). Central to this controversy is a "confidentiality agreement" that students were supposedly made to sign.

The American for Truth (in name only)web page just posted the alleged confidentiality agreement.

And if this is the document that has been causing a lot of controversy, then Americans for Truth (in name only), Concerned Women for America, and all of the bloggers who have been hyping the Deerfield incident up as an attempt by the lgbt community to "indoctrinate" children have a LOT of explaining to do.

The so-called confidentiality agreement is a small part of the list of rules that those participating in the program agree to follow. These rules govern their conduct in the program.

No one is encouraged to keep things from their parents. In fact, they are encouraged to seek help if there is a problem.

This is what the part about confidentiality says (and I am transcribing):

Our agreements and commitments to each other

Confidentiality

Every person keeps what comes up in class confidential, unless it is dangerous to do so - that is unless a situation in class requires us to get outside help.

We do not repeat what someone says in class outside of class except if we have permission of the person that said it.

We will not continue a conversation outside of class without permission from all the people that were involved during the class.

Bottom line: What happens in our classroom stays in our classroom.

Exceptions to the confidentiality in which case (the teacher's name - I will not repeat it) will get outside help are:

If someone in the class reports being hurt;

If someone reports that they are hurting someone else; or

If someone reports that they are hurting or want to hurt themselves.

The rest of the two page document continues to give rules about respecting each other's right to talk and not making judgements on someone because his or her opinion. If students agree to abide by all of these regulations, they sign the form.

There are four other attachments to the commitment agreement that was posted. Americans for Truth (in name only) makes the claim that they are a part of the agreement.

But I doubt it.

It obvious that they were added by whoever posted the agreement on the webpage in order to enhance the lie of "gay indoctrination."

In short, the Deerfield Confidentiality Agreement controversy is yet another lie by members of the anti-gay industry.

Let me simplify the situation:

Deerfield High School has been conducting this program for years to help students adjust to high school. Five years ago, it added a panel discussion about gay students.

Parents got angry over the fact that gay students are going to be open about themselves. They sought help from anti-gay industry groups to stop the panel.

Someone from the either the parents group or the anti-gay industry groups took the list of rules that the participants of the program agreed to abide by and hyped the portion about confidentiality into a lie that claimed students were "encouraged" to sign a confidentiality agreement about one particular part of the program (the gay panel discussion.)

This lie was spread by various anti-gay industry groups, web pages, and bloggers all over the internet.

Boom! You got yourself a moral panic.

Let me predict what happens next.

I noticed on the Americans for Truth (in name only), it is announced that one of the parents opposing the gay student panel discussion will appear on the Laura Ingraham Show.

This parent is obviously going to repeat the lies of "gay indoctrinations" and "confidentiality agreements" until it is hyped all over talk radio. Then comes television.

And this is sad because the program that started all of this is a good idea. Students entering high schools should have some way to speak their minds and clear their heads.

More programs like this would mean less Columbine incidents.

But all because a group of parents do not like the fact gay students are encouraged to speak about their lives, the program is in danger of being misconstrued.

In pursuit of their so-called moral image, these parents have sold out their integrity.

I sincerely hope they don't regret what they have done.

A dash of inneundo, a smidgen of manipulation and you got yourself a conspiracy theory

The latest cause celebre of the anti-gay industry is occurring at Deerfield High School in Illinois. Here are the basic facts:

At Deerfield High School, there is a program that is geared to helping students adjust to high school. One component of this program is a panel discussion that includes speakers from the school's gay/straight alliance. These students talk about such things as being bullied because of their orientation.

Some parents are upset over this, claiming that their children are being "indoctrinated" by the supposed "gay agenda." These parents are demanding that the school end the gay panel discusssion. Naturally groups like Americans for Truth (in name only) and the Concerned Women for America are assisting in this effort. Now as far as it has been reported, the gay panel discussion is the only thing these parents object to.

The issue has been made stickier due to allegations that students were made to sign a confidentiality agreement. However, it is not known whether or not this agreement pertains solely to the gay panel discussion or the program in general.

In all honesty, I do not feel comfortable with the idea of students having to sign a confidentiality agreement.

However, I am made even more uncomfortable as to how the anti-gay industry and the bloggers who believe their lies have spun this story.

According to Assistant Superintendent for Human Resources for Township High School District 113 Suzan Hebson, the program has been going on for many years and five years ago, the panel discussion by the gay students was added.

She also said parents did have the choice of opting their child out of any session they feel uncomfortable with. Lastly, she said, the program was well advertised.

Members of the anti-gay industry and some bloggers still made claims that students were forced to participate in the panel discussion:

14 Year Olds Forced Into Gay Seminar and Gag Order by School

Officials at Deerfield High School in Deerfield, Ill., have ordered their 14-year-old freshman class into a "gay" indoctrination seminar, after having them sign a confidentiality agreement promising not to tell their parents.

Some teachers at Deerfield High School in Deerfield, Illinois are forcing 14-year-old freshmen to sign a confidentiality agreement saying they will not tell anyone, not even their parents, what they are taught in a pro-homosexual sensitivity training seminar. Martha Kleder spoke with Laura-Sue Hauser, head of North Shore Student Advocacy, a group of concerned area parents, and Matt Barber, CWA’s Policy Director for Cultural Issues

Notice how these sites link the confidentiality agreement with the panel discussion by the gay students. But again there is that question of what does the confidentiality agreement pertain to.

While I am not comfortable with the confidentiality agreement, did it pertain solely to the gay panel discussion or the entire program in general?

At first, this question may not seem like a big deal, but it really is. If the confidentiality agreement pertained to the entire program rather than just the gay student panel discussion, then all claims of "indoctrinating students into the homosexual agenda then demanding that they be silent about it" is yet another example of the conspiracy theory technique by the anti-gay industry.

By juxtaposing facts, the anti-gay industry is claiming, yet again, that gays and lesbians want "access" to children, as if we are some type of collective boogeyman cum Baba Yaga.

And speaking of manipulating, check out this allegation from One News Now (formerly Agape Press). I emphasized the connotative words:

Concerned Women for America is blasting an Illinois high school for urging students not to tell their parents about its mandatory homosexual indoctrination program. Deerfield High School in Chicago has a class called "Freshman Advisory," in which ninth-graders are required to attend a panel discussion led by the Gay-Straight Alliance Network. The panel features homosexual upperclassmen telling students about their sexual experiences.

In the interest of fairness and presenting both sides, I looked for and found a letter written by one of the students who participated in a past panel discussion:

For the last five years, the school has been giving a presentation to the freshman advisories about SAGA, the Gay-Straight Alliance at the school. During the presentation, a panel of students gives a combination of personal stories and statistics relating to LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender) life both in our school and in the world at large.

The stories are those of personal experiences students have had, and they are told by LGBT students and straight allies. The statistics provided are statistics from well-respected sources. Then, the panel fields questions from the students. Having seen the panel my freshman year and having spoken on it my sophomore and junior years, I can say that in no instance had anyone on the panel accused any other student of being a bigot for not agreeing with them; we present our personal stories as our personal opinions on the issue.

At no part during the presentation are kids encouraged to engage in homosexual behavior (indeed, we are of the belief that homosexuality is something you are born with, and thus it is logically impossible to ‘recruit’ people to a ‘homosexual lifestyle’) and at no point are kids told that they are wrong or deviant for having views different from those we present: we merely intend to clear up the stereotypes surrounding gays, and to encourage a tolerant environment.

. . . Just a few months back, my home was vandalized by a number of teens; this was an incredibly upsetting and hurtful experience, but despite this I have found support from friends, family, and those in the school to help me through this. There comes a point where all of us have our beliefs and morals challenged by those who believe differently from us. It is essential that we learn how to be accepting of those who disagree with us, and that we teach our children how to disagree with dignity.

Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings, indeed.

My - - - weeps for General Pace

Poor General Peter Pace.

He insults the gays and lesbians who are fighting to preserve the freedom that makes this country great and folks have the nerve to criticize him?

I mean really!

Well as you all probably already know, the anti-gay industry have grabbed onto this issue, making General Pace seem like yet another victim of the so-called Gay Mafia.

Their spokespersons have gone on record calling Pace courageous for his ridiculous comments.

On the other hand, the Center for Military Readiness said that his comments didn't go far enough.

The Center for Military Readiness seems to be yet another group sending up the anti-gay industry message behind an official sounding name (i. e. American College of Pediatricians).

Its web page says the following:

The Center for Military Readiness is an independent, non-partisan 501(c)(3) educational organization formed to take a leadership role in promoting sound military personnel policies in the armed forces. CMR is a unique alliance of civilian, active duty and retired military people in all 50 states, and is the only organization that concentrates on military personnel issues full-time.

Apparently the above definition doesn't include mentioning anything about the recent controversy at the Walter Reed Hospital.

And our friend Peter LaBarbera over at the Americans for Truth (in name only) web page is going off the chain (a saying I picked up from my younger brother) over the entire controversy:

Gay activists have adopted a ‘CSI’ tactic of ‘Censoring, Smearing and Intimidating’ moral critics like Gen. Peter Pace and Dr. James Dobson. By trying to silence critics and equating moral beliefs with hate, bigotry and “homophobia,” the homosexual movement is fueling a dangerous cultural clash between religious freedom and “gay rights.”

Peter goes on to name several people who have been supposedly intimidated over their anti-gay comments. Pardon me while I deliver a little truth:

James Dobson - Peter neglects to mention that Dobson had gotten into trouble because he distorted the work of two researchers (Drs. Carol Gilligan and Kyle Pruett) in his column in Time criticizing Mary Cheney for wanting to raise a child.

Matt Barber - Barber was fired from All-State for writing an anti-gay column. Peter claims that Barber wrote the column on his own time. He omits the fact that Barber involved the company by mentioning it in the bio after his column.

Ann Coulter - Now I'm not even going to touch that one. Peter must be running out of manufactured victims to even dare mention her recent controversy.

What Peter and everyone else defending Pace's comments seem to forget is that this is not entirely an issue of morality. It is also one of policy. Even Colin Powell, when defending the military's aversion to open gays and lesbians serving, made that clear. His reasonings were that open gays and lesbians would hurt military cohesion and not his personal moral feelings.

And that is the reason why Pace has stepped into a hornet's nest. Moral reasonings alone are usually not justification to make policy or laws.

The anti-gay industry should know this. In other issues, Focus on the Family, the Concerned Women for America, etc have manufactured reasons (i.e. the supposed short life span of gay men, linking homosexuality to pedophilia) to affect public policy as it pertains to the lgbt community.

No matter how they try to defend Pace's slip of the tongue, his comments can only hurt them. As long we talk about this issue as a matter of personal morality, it is difficult for them to create lies keeping openly gay and lesbians soldiers to serve their country.

The next battle - may we win it

I have to hand it to our friend, Peter LaBarbera. The site of his group, American for Truth (in name only) keeps me informed on the issue of the lgbt community. His site is an excellent resource, as long as one ignores the lies and hysteria that comes with it.

For example, this article about a school committee that will forsee whether or not to recommend a video for classrooms:

The district is set to announce today that it has formed a committee that will make a recommendation about a controversial video featuring gay parents, but committee members' names will remain secret to protect them from harassment.

Nine PTA parents will serve on the committee, district spokeswoman Jeanne Smith said, along with a group of teachers.

Just as they did in the recent David Parker controversy, Peter and his posse will try to spin the incorrect idea that talking about same-sex led households constitutes a talk about sexual intercourse.

And that will be the next battle.

Fresh off of their victories in the fight against same-sex marriage, the anti-gay industry will try to further devalue and dehumanize lgbts by giving our families a sort of scarlet letter in classrooms. Oh don't mention the fact that gays and lesbians constitute families and actually raise children in those families. That means we have to talk about nasty gay sex.

What a bunch of lies.

I sincerely hope that the anti-gay industry will not be successful this time. The issue of same-sex marriage was one that they were able to put in simplistic terms:

Marriage has always been between a man and a woman. Gays and lesbians are the invaders trying to change the concept and thereby destroy marriage.

While they were busy pushing this point of view, something interesting was happening. LGBTs were continuing to form relationships and they were continuing to raise children. We didn't stop because of we were being denied marriage rights. The ability to have a family is central to the human existence.

And whether the anti-gay industry likes it or not, the lgbt community are included in this designation.

So in the case of having families, we cannot be seen as outsiders. We have children attending schools and those children have every right to celebrate their families and not be thought of as immoral because their families are not "ideal" in the eyes of some.

The issue of lgbt families is so complex that the anti-gay industry cannot simplify it. People are just not going to buy into so easily as they did with same-sex marriage. People realize that at the end of the day, any action they endorse could eventually harm a child whose only "crime" seems to be in a same sex household.

And this complexity includes how these same-sex families should be talked about in schools.

But that doesn't mean members of the anti-gay industry won't try:

In America there are powers that are hell bent on sexualizing our kids at very early ages, and in perverse ways. The main place this sexualization is happening is in the schools.

This writer includes the lie that David Parker's son's school was talking about gay sexual intercourse. She even infers that gay men want to molest children.

These attempts to make every case that opposes homosexuality one about sexual intercourse underscores a point.

The battle for gay rights is not about sex. To a degree, it's not even about being able to love who your heart tells you to.

The battle for gay rights is a fight for the right to self-determination. Apparently some folks feel that we should conform to their ignorant ideas of lgbts: the hedonistic, irresponsible gay man, the violent manhating lesbian, the cheating bisexual who cannot comprehend monogamy, the transgender always looking to "trick" straight men into thinking that she was born a woman,

God forbid we forge our own identities. God forbid we look to God for approval rather than those who say they are speaking for God. And God forbid that we demand what is ours as taxpaying Americans - that the government look out for our interests.

The anti-gay industry has every right to think that homosexuality is all about sexual intercourse. But we have every right not to live our lives according to their ignorance.

And we have every right to raise hell when they try to hurt our families.

One more thing

So Marine General Peter Pace thinks that homosexuality is immoral, huh?

Well, to channel John Aravois, badly equipping our people to fight the war in Iraq or allowing wounded soldiers to sleep in their own urine when they are lucky enough not to be blown away in cases of friendly fire (i,e, Pat Tillman) is even more immoral.

Are we really winning this so-called war on terror?

Sorry Harry Jackson, but your mess ain't real

Dear Minister Harry Jackson,

I read with great interest your column asking me to join you in the cultural fight against the gay community.

With all due respect, I am going to have to pass for a myriad of reasons.

In the first place, gay marriage has not contributed to any type of decline in the African-American community. I noticed that you made that claim but didn't give any reasonable degree of proof backing it up.

Secondly, I have heard your rhetoric before. Unfortunately, in the wake of the civil rights movements, there has risen a class of black leadership willing to stab their brothers and sisters in the back for a little face time and some public influence.

I might remind you, before you leaf through your Bible to the verses that supposedly speak against homosexuality, the Word of God has been pervered to justify slavery and segregation. It always amazes me that folks like you always seem to forget that.

There seems to be this claim that the African-American civil rights movement and the movement for lgbt self-determination cannot be thought of as similar. You may have a point there. As a matter of fact, let me further make more points as to how the two are different:

No, gay people have not been beaten and murdered because of their orientation. Sakia Gunn accidentally slipped on that knife belonging to that young black man. And those parademics who should have been helping Tyra Hunter after her car accident rather than laughing at her for being transngender were just doing their jobs.

No, gay people have not had our lives devalued by the fear and ignorance of others. It is rather fun to be judged by someone's fevered imagination of how I have sex.

No, gay people have never been made to sit on the back of the bus. That being the case, legislation created to devalue us and our families is no big deal.

No, gay people have not been insulted and spiritually beaten down by name-calling like African-Americans have. I rather think that the "f" word is a term of endearment, especially when it is said by a group of young men carrying baseball bats or boards with nails in them.

You are so right, Minister Harry Jackson, the fight for self-respect and your God-given rights cannot be seen as universal. Some people deserve rights more than others. And those who have the rights should get to judge the lives of those aren't so lucky.

But let me tell you what is universal, Minister Harry Jackson.

Presumption is universal,

Ignorance is universal,

Self-righteousness is universal.

And you have just proven that these things also know no color.

Reiteration and Recap

It's Friday and this week has been a killer. Rather than do an original post, I want to recap the points that my upcoming book will make. Repeating correct information is always positive. Feel free to post this anywhere:

Six Distortion Techniques of the Anti-Gay Industry

1. Using nonrepresentative or out of date studies to make generalizations, or distorting legitimate studies to give misleading conclusions

2. Repetition

3. Conspiracy Theory

4. Dire Consequences

5. Phony Experts

6. Dehumanizing Semantics

Top Anti-Gay Industry Lies

1. Homosexuality is a lifestyle more harmful than cigarette smoking

2. Gay men have a short life span

3. The gay and lesbian community have a high rate of domestic violence

4. Unhealthy behaviors (i.e. substance abuse, promiscuous sexual behavior) is indicative of the gay or lesbian orientation.

5. Gay men molest children at a high rate.

6. Gays and lesbians want to silence Christians .

7. Gays and lesbians recruit people, particularly children, to their "life style."

8. Gays and lesbians are following a six-point plan to take over America.

9. Any judge who rules in favor of the gay and lesbian community in a case is an "activist judge."

10. Anal sex is "homosexual behavior."

11. Robert Spitzer’s study confirms that gays and lesbians can change their orientation.

12. Gays and lesbians want to force acceptance.

13. Gay bowel syndrome is a legitimate medical term.

14. A man who molests a boy or a woman who molests a girl is automatically homosexual.

15. A convenience sample or out-of-date study can be used to generalize about an entire community.

Controlling the semantics

While everyone seems to be talking about the gay porn star who spoke at the Conservative Political Action Conference, I will ignore it.

I will also purposefully ignore the Ann Coulter/John Edwards controversy. Every time I see or hear Ann Coulter, a part of me tunes her out because I know that what comes out of her mouth is designed to shock, not progress dialogue.

I find her boring.

I would prefer to talk about something more important and vital to our community. Earlier today, I mentioned an upcoming anti-gay fest in Illinois. This is why that event is going to take place:

Several parents are claiming that mandatory freshman orientation class at Deerfield High School in Illinois which includes a segment where teens from the Straight and Gay Alliance, a school club, speak about there experiences as gay high school is encouraging homosexuality.

The classes are designed to help students adjust to high school; parents who object to the content can have their children excused.

However, a resident of Deerfield, Lora Sue Hauser, wants the panel discontinued. Hauser, the leader of a group called North Shore Student Advocacy, says that parents and trained counselors are better equipped to handle the issues brought up in the classes.

Gay issues is only one part of this orientation, but it is the only part that parents object to.

Hence our friend Peter LaBarbera will be paying a visit to the area to spin all of his conspiracy theories and lies about the lgbt community.

What is happening in Illinois is something that the anti-gay industry is attempting in various places in the country. If schools or any other entity don't approach discussions of gay people using their narrow-minded interpretations, then somehow the discussions are actually indoctrinations.

And please note the semantics here. In the mouths of the anti-gay industry (be they Concerned Women for American, Americans for Truth (in name only), the American Family Association, etc.), the use of words and phrases like "promoting homosexuality" or "indoctrinating children into the homosexual lifestyle" are designed to pull the emotional strings of people, and thereby motivate them through a combination of fear and their religious beliefs rather than truth.

To call this a skilled technique in huge plan to portray the lgbt community as angry alien outsiders is not paranoia on my part.

How is it when these folks try to define who we are based on their lies, they are telling the truth, but when we are explaining our lives, we are trying to "recruit."

I find it ironic that they spin tales of gay people trying to silence Christians because in this case, just who is trying to silence who?