Constance McMillen's classmates learn the costs of gloating

By now, many of us know the story of Constance McMillen, the Fulton, MS student who wanted to attend the Itawamba Agricultural High School prom with her girlfriend.

The school decided to cancel the prom rather than allowing her to do such, something else we all know.

The ACLU sued and the courts ruled that McMillen's rights were violated but the school was not forced to put the prom back on. In response, some of McMillen's fellow classmates held a "private party," which she was supposed to be invited to. However, as it turns out, McMillen, as well as a few other students who had learning disabilities were steered to a "fake prom" while their classmates held their party.

And to make matters worse, some of these classmates created a Facebook page making fun of McMillen and gloating about how they "showed her," including pictures of them smiling and dancing at the prom.

Yes, we all know the story. But now it gets interesting.

An online buddy of mine, Pam Spaulding received an email from a student concerning a post she wrote about the situation. The student asked Pam to remove pictures of her and her classmates enjoying themselves. Pam, who, when she wrote the original story did not give out the names of the student or her friends, took the pictures from another public site created to gloat about what had happened.

Pam was very nice in explaining to the young lady that the pictures will not be removed and she is well within her rights in posting them.

And this is not the only thing I noticed. On various other blogs, students are posting comments trying to somehow rationalize not only their decision to make McMillen and the other students feel like outcasts but gloating about it afterwards.

And why? Because apparently the Facebook page (which I will not post, but it's called "Constance, quit yer cryin'") is getting a lot of attention. Many people have joined the group to voice their displeasure about what happened.

As far as I know, no one has been threatened, but some of the comments aren't pretty. A lot of them, mine included, are reasonable and rational in voicing the opinion that what happened was awful.

But let me be honest here. I don't feel sorry for you students of Itawamba Agricultural High School who are now feeling the blowback from what you did.

You got played by the school. My guess is that when school officials canceled the prom, they expected you all to make McMillen the scapegoat and you did with as much fervor as a pack of wild dogs in Call of the Wild.

So you decided to hold a party, making sure to steer McMillen away to a fake prom. You celebrated like you won a big victory, and then to make matters worse, you gloated about what you did in a public manner designed to humiliate McMillen.

What exactly did you think would happen?

This ain't Carrie and McMillen doesn't have telekinetic powers, but you are experiencing a nasty shock, aren't you?

I don't wish any of you ill will and I certainly don't wish any of you violence, but you brought this on yourselves.

I read one of you saying that you resent how McMillen was making the school sound backwards and I found that notion ridiculous because it's obvious that none of you needed her help in that department. You did such a completely excellent job of it yourselves.

Now how do you feel?

'Gay lifestyle' finally revealed and other Wednesday midday news briefs

Myth of the 'gay lifestyle' justifies bias - Amen L.Z.

May Day: Saving America From Forced Starvation, Obama's Brownshirts, and God's Wrath - Janet Porter resembles a fruitcake on Christmas. Never mind trying to make sense out of that. If you can, then maybe you can make sense out of her ramblings.

Foxx fuming over Stern's gay jibe - Shut up, Alvin, shut up, Alvin. I'm so conflicted now. Howard Stern is a dumbass but the comment by Foxx about eating pizza in a shower was stupid.

Fired Maine reporter gains religious aid - BEFORE the religious right pushes this as yet another phony story of the discriminated Christian, it's worth mentioning that even though the reporter in question used his personal email, it was on company time using company equipment.

NAACP president calls out gay community for lack of black support

Here we go again:

We all know that Julian Bond Civil Rights Leader and Board Chairman of the NAACP has been a steadfast LGBT Rights supporter.  But today NAACP President Benjamin Jealous, who has been mostly non-commital where the "organization" is concerned tried to lay the fault squarely at the LGBT Community's feet when it comes to the fact that black activist have not been supporting the Gay Rights Movement.

In an article from ThinkBig::

I really just have one thing to say about this. No one from the African-American community ever had to do outreach for me to stand up for their rights. I have marched, I have protested, and I have signed petitions. And I did it because it was the RIGHT thing to do. And I did it gladly.

Jealous is also attuned to the civil rights struggles of another minority group—gay Americans—and aware of the public perception that black activists have been lukewarm in supporting their cause. Yet for his own family as well as the NAACP, he says, gay rights are not only important but "personal"—and if there's a gap between the movements, it's a product of insufficient outreach from the LGBT side.

I remarked "here we go again" because I can predict what's going to happen next.

Some in the lgbt community are going to be get defensive instead of maybe assessing the fact that Jealous's words have a ring of truth. Already, terms like "hater" and "homophobe" have been thrown around.

The black community will most likely have another "if we ignore it, maybe it will go away" moment that it always does when it comes to issues of the gay community.

Meanwhile, lgbts of color, who are by now are so used to this sort of thing, will wonder yet again "will these turkeys ever get this issue right?"

I'm sorry if I sound cynical but when it comes to the tired old argument of black community vs. gay community, I feel as if some entity out of a Roger Corman movie has attached itself to my side and has sapped the energy right out of me, putting in its place a kind of weariness.

So let me be succinct. I'm tired of the arguments. It doesn't matter if the gay movement for equality is the same as the African-American civil rights movement (it is). And it doesn't matter if sometimes, well meaning white gays and lesbians refuse to acknowledge that they take unfair liberties in assessing the two movements without knowing the inner workings of the black civil rights movements (they do).

We are going to continue to have this tired argument until both communities stop clinging to past symbolism and acknowledge the present and probably only true connection between the black and gay community - me and the rest of my lgbt brothers and sisters of color.

Speaking for myself, I get a very low opinion of both communities when this tug of war of position takes place. I don't feel like a person to the black or gay community. I feel like a commodity, a frozen asset. Both communities seem to be so busy with trying to use what tie I have to them for their own purpose that neither want to look at me as a person whose African-American heritage and lgbt sensibility mingle together to create something rich and unique which would be an asset to both communities.

I am useful to the lgbt community because I am gay. I am useful to the African-American community because I am a black man. But I don't seem to be useful to either community as a gay black man.


There are some of us who cannot separate being black and being gay into two separate camps because we encompass both identities.

But the problem is that neither community seems to get that point.

Hate groups, fake proms. bad interviews and other Tuesday afternoon news briefs

Matt Barber: I Know You Are But What Am I? - Americans for Truth is an officially designated hate site. Deal with it, Matt Barber. It really couldn't have accomplished that without you. 

VIDEO: CNN’s Kyra Phillips’ Awful Interview with Richard Cohen - What the hell is this hot mess? Richard Cohen getting taken seriously? 

He who 'sins us' vs. sense as it pertains to us - Tony Perkins and the Family Research Council claims that counting gay couples in the census adds up to false data. Well they would know about false data, wouldn't they? 

McMillen: I Was Sent to Fake Prom - Coldhearted, hateful mess.

Religious right groups can't make up their minds when lying about ENDA

Fast on the heels of the Traditional Value Coalition claiming that the Employment Non-Discrimination Act  (ENDA) would "force" children to be held hostage in classrooms by "drag queen" teachers comes this email from the Family Research Council:

ENDA should be called The Discrimination Against Christian Workers Act. Why? Just ask ...

Jon and Elaine Huguenin, who were saddled with legal costs that could run into the hundreds of thousands of dollars because they politely declined to take "commitment ceremony" photos of two lesbians.

Rolf Szabo, who was fired by Kodak after 23 years of faithful service because he declined to participate in the company's "Coming Out Day" celebration of bisexual, and transgender (cross-dresser) employees.

The Christian employees at Sandia National Laboratories, who were ordered to take down their family photos when homosexual co-workers complained that "traditional family" images were demeaning.

If the federal ENDA law passes, what happened to the Huguenins ... and Rolf Szabo ... and the Christians at Sandia Laboratories . . . could happen to any Christian or person of moral conviction, anywhere. Working together, we can protect your religious liberty.

ENDA will give Washington liberals virtually unlimited power to force every business with more than 15 employees to embrace immoral sexual behavior as normal and worthy of celebration . . . or face harsh federal sanctions.

Yes, Even Churches!

So which is it? A "cross-dressing teachers bill?" or the "Discrimination Against Christians Act?"

ENDA is neither. While the Family Research Council pulls out anecdotes claiming to show how ENDA could potentially discriminate against Christians, the organization fails to mention that the religious exemption of the 2009 version of ENDA (Section 6) is the same as the Civil Rights Act of 1964:

This Act shall not apply to a corporation, association, educational institution, or society that is exempt from the religious discrimination provisions of title VII of the Civil Rights Acts of 1964 pursuant to section 702(a) or 703(e)(2) of such Act (42 U.S.C. 2000e-1(a); 2000e-2(e)(2)).

And of course the anecdotes the FRC pushes gives only one side of the story. For example Szabo's letter was not THAT polite:

"Please do not send this type of information to me anymore, as I find it disgusting and offensive.

"Thank you,

"Rolf Szabo."

To make matters worse, Szabo sent this email out to ALL employees. The company deemed that his email was unnecessary and offensive to its lgbt employees and fired him, just like it would probably do if he had sent an email out that the company would deem to be offensive towards African-Americans, or women, or yes even Christians.

While someone who calls himself a Christian has a right to not participate in an event he deems as a sin, he has NO right to demean other employees and that's why Szabo was fired.

FRC's email is another example of fear tactics used by religious right groups to claim that gays and lesbians want to either harm children or silence Christians.

And it proves yet again the similarity between racism and homophobia - they both involve fear, stereotypes, and ignorance.

Related posts:

No wonder the Traditional Values Coalition is considered a hate group

Family Research Council exploiting Amanda Simpson's appointment to stop ENDA
  
Family Research Council head misrepresents credible information to hurt ENDA

Bathrooms, Church Exemptions, and Lies: Five ways the religious right misrepresents ENDA

American College of Pediatricians trying to work anti-gay web site into the schools

Last night I wrote what I call an "emergency post" on a new web page (Facts About Youth) by the phony medical organization, the American College of Pediatricians.

This web page repackages standard anti-gay junk science as legitimate research.

This morning, I've learned, according to the Family Research Council, that 14,800 school district superintendents in the country were sent a letter by the American College of Pediatricians introducing them to the site and encouraging them to peruse it.

That's 14,800 school district superintendents encouraged to read and pass along information such as:

1. Gay men are disease ridden animals who enjoy playing with feces,

2. Lesbians are equally diseased and irresponsible,

3. and that there is proof that homosexuality is just a changeable condition.

And we wonder why it was so easy for Constance McMillen's school to treat her the way it did.

And we wonder why it's so hard for lgbt youth to accept their God-given sexual orientations. It's bad enough when wanton homophobes such as Peter LaBarbera tell lies about the lgbt community.

But when people who purport to be medical professionals pass along these lies, it should be criminal.

American College of Pediatricians, NARTH pushes new site featuring old anti-gay lies

Last night, for a brief second, I reached "the other side of the mountain," so to speak. I reached a moment where I was, in the words of an old saying, a little north of where I wanted to be.

In short, I went ballistic.

Those who know me and my work can probably guess why. There is another religious right web page purporting to give the so-called true facts about the gay community. And these true facts are the same old lies. Even worse, this site is directed to children and adults working in the school system.


According to its web page, Facts About Youth:

is a resource created by health professionals to provide policymakers, parents and youth with the most current medical and psychological facts about sexual development.

Amid debate in the medical and mental health fields concerning the causes and proper approaches to youth with non-heterosexual attractions, Facts is a non-political, non-religious channel presenting the most current facts on the subject. Facts is committed to advancing a school environment in which all students will experience the opportunity to achieve optimal health and safety, even in the midst of differing worldviews. Facts is intended to be a resource to promote the factual and respectful discussion of these potentially divisive issues. This is a web site for and about youth and their needs.

You want to now who these "health professionals" are? Again according to the web site, Facts About Youth:

is a project of the American College of Pediatricians, in coalition with other organizations who share a concern for the well-being of all youth. Unfortunately, some medical organizations, influenced by political correctness, have misrepresented science in order to affirm unhealthy lifestyles as normal behavior. Facts presents science-based information to clarify the medical and psychological discussions concerning this important aspect of a child’s life. Facts will not engage in the polemics of opinion, but will objectively offer the facts for all to see and assimilate. Facts is interested only in the welfare and protection of children and their families.

The College has received support and assistance for this project from the National Association for Research & Therapy of Homosexuality (NARTH), the Pediatric Psychosocial Development Committee, other like-minded organizations, and parents and individuals with a personal perspective on issues related to gender identification and how they impact children.

*The Pediatric Psychosocial Development Committee is an exterior sub-committee of the American College of Pediatricians and consists of the following members, all experts on the sexual development of youth:
Dean Byrd, PhD
Rick Fitzgibbons, MD
Arthur Goldberg, JD, CRS, BCPC
Trayce Hansen, PhD
Joe Nicolosi, PhD
John Raney, MD
George Rekers, PhD

I've talked about the lies of the American College of Pediatricians before. Also, those of us familiar with the  inner workings of the industry of phony religious right studies know some of those names of these folks behind Facts About Youth.  Joseph Nicolosi is a man who has made it his life's work to peddle the inaccurate notion that homosexuality is a changeable condition. According to the site Truth Wins Out:

Nicolosi is also known for his strange theories, such as encouraging his male clients to drink Gatorade and call friends “dude” to become more masculine. He also believes that “Non-homosexual men who experience defeat and failure may also experience homosexual fantasies or dreams.”

And George Rekers is a former professor at the University of South Carolina and a founder of the Family Research Council who has testified against the lgbt community in adoption cases.

So to say that this web site is nonpolitical is the first lie. And it's certainly not the last.

Facts About Youth contains the same tired lies and misinformation about the gay community found on almost every religious right web page and repeated by almost every religious right talking head. The following are just a few: