Values Voters debate my pinkie toe!!

The radio show was taped today and I think I did rather well.

But on the national front, some members of the anti-gay industry held a presidential debate under guise that it was a debate for "values voters."

From what I hear, they sang Christian songs and prayed.

Then proceeded to lie like a bunch of rugs.

Wisely Fred Thompson, Rudy Guiliani, and John McCain did not show up. But there were enough "candidates" there to make an impression.

Specifically perennial phony candidate Alan Keyes.

Keyes disappoints me because he has so much potential. But he reduces himself to a laughing stock with every campaign he enters and loses (by a wide margin) because of his constant talk of "moral values." Keyes is a combination of Harold Stassen, Jonathan Edwards, Cotton Mather, and Increase Mather in a tired chocolate shell that works to simultaneously give me gas and put me to sleep.

To Keyes, no one has the right moral fiber but him. That is this man’s constant schtick; his gimmick.

I suspect that if Keyes made it into Heaven, he would start criticizing God for not running the place on a "Scriptural" basis.

Keyes reminds me of a fancy looking restaurant that tries to fill up customers on appeitizers because it has no decent entrees. In other words, all he can do is talk an interesting (and bear in mind I said interesting, not good) game. But he has no substance. And every time he enters a campaign or debate, it is not to serve the needs of the public but to feed his own yawning darkness of an ego.

If by some insane anti-miracle, Keyes actually won a campaign, my bet is that the first thing he would do is piss in his pants because he would have to back up his bullshit with action.

There was one question that did disturb me. It was asked by "ex-gay for pay" Stephen Bennett:

Would you support legislation ensuring that schools would lose federal funding if they exposed children to homosexual indoctrination?

Knowing the anti-gay industry’s love of code words and distorting semantics, this means that funds should be taken away from any school that dares to acknowledge the fact that lgbts exist in places other than public bathrooms, "bathhouses," and dirty shadows.

This entire thing really boggles the mind. One would think that these so-called righteous folks learned something from 1992. For those who can’t remember, the Republican National Convention’s preoccupation with homosexuality, particularly Pat Buchanan’s speech about a cultural war, spooked the hell out of the country and paved the way for Bill Clinton’s election.

How strange that history seems to repeat itself.

Well those who don’t learn from history generally find themselves repeating it. And personally, that suits me just fine.