Thursday, November 22, 2007

Janet Folger predicts the future and it's a doozy

I hope everyone is having an excellent Thanksgiving holiday.

As for myself, I wanted to stay in bed and watch the Law and Order SVU, CI marathon on the USA Network, but I opted to visit relatives.

It was nice. They asked about my book and I told them. Later about that. Much, much later.

Anyway I ran across something written by anti-gay industry member Janet Folger. Folger has made a career with whining about how Christians are constantly victimized while at the same time seeing nothing wrong with Christians doing the persecuting.

This piece has to be considered as her magnum opus in hypocrisy and bullshit. It is a bastardized version of the legendary Michael Swift piece. Folger takes a different tact, however. According to her, the following is what could happen if Mike Huckabee isn't elected president.

I am posting the entire thing because it simply defies all attempts to describe it. Read it tongue in cheek because it is hilarious. And it just goes to show the hysterical mindset of many so-called "people of faith":

Letter from a future prisoner

To the Resistance:

I'm writing this letter from prison, where I've been since the beginning of 2010. Since Hillary was elected in '08, Christian persecution in America has gotten even worse than we predicted.

When the so-called "Fairness Doctrine" was signed into law, my radio program was yanked off the air along with all the others that dared discuss moral issues on Christian radio. The networks just couldn't bring themselves to air a pro-abortion program or one that advocates the homosexual agenda for the government mandated "balance" because broadcasting lies went against their basic beliefs – I don't blame them.


We knew "Thought Crimes" was in danger of becoming law back when it passed Congress in 2007, but thankfully, President Bush kept his promise to veto it. But, tragically, Hillary signed that most dangerous bill in America – ushering in the criminalization of Christianity. And now, even my book, "The Criminalization of Christianity," has been banned as "hate speech" just as I predicted when I wrote it back in 2005.

When the "Employment Non-Discrimination Act" ("Thought Crimes" for the Workplace) became law, businesses and ministries were targeted by homosexual activists and were forced to close when they wouldn't comply with a law forcing them to hire those opposed to their beliefs on moral issues.

When they canceled my program, banned my book and targeted my ministry, I knew it was only a matter of time before I'd be forced into "prison ministry" against my will. Unfortunately for our nation, that ministry is growing fast. A homeschooling mom was assigned the cell next to me. I try to comfort her, but she cries constantly at the thought of her kids being raised in government foster care.

The forced labor here makes me think that I should have done more for our brothers and sisters in China sent to labor camps for the crime of hosting a home church, or those imprisoned in every Muslim country for choosing Christ over Allah. We should have seen the writing on the wall when Yahoo turned over confidential searches to the Chinese government, sending people to prison, and when Google barred American Christian sites from its search engines as "haters." Finding allied ministries is now almost impossible.

Most didn't see it coming. I try not to think about how the 2009 "Freedom of Choice Act" wiped out every single pro-life law from parental notice to the ban on partial birth abortion. And how "anti-reproductive rights" was added to the "Thought Crime" statute, which, like California before the election, means a year in jail if someone claims to feel "intimidated" by anything a pro-lifer might do – like express their beliefs in public.

But, like the homeschool mom in the cell beside me, I cry too. I cry mostly because it didn't have to be this way. Just three years ago – in 2007 – we had a chance to unite and achieve our lifetime goals of restoring protection to children in the womb, and protecting our foundational relationship of marriage between a man and a woman. And now the suggestion of it is treated like the illegal mention of a "mom" or "dad" to the California School Board.

Martin Niemöller's words ring true. I see them with a modern twist:

When they came for the Chinese, I did not speak up because those slave-labor goods were so very cheap.

When they came for the Afghan and Iraqi Christians, I did not speak up because I didn't want to undermine the war effort.

When they came for the German homeschoolers, I didn't speak up because I live in America.

When they came for the Philadelphia 11, I didn't speak up, because I was from Cleveland.

When they came for me, speaking up had become illegal.


No, in 2007 and 2008, American Christians were so used to the status quo that they forgot we were in this to win. Compromised and divided, they choose to protest rather than protect.

When the Christian and conservative leaders couldn't stop fighting over their candidate of compromise or their favorite "tier two" pick, we missed our last chance at victory – victory for children facing the abortionists' knife and victory for the institution foundational to our society – marriage.

All the money in the world couldn't buy Mitt Romney's trust. And no one seemed to remember what Rudy Giuliani had said of the previous Clinton administration: "Most of Clinton's policies are similar to most of mine." Or how he praised the founder of Planned Parenthood, Margaret Sanger, and offered up a citywide proclamation honoring the infamous racist eugenicist, whose organization has brutally killed more babies than any other in the Western Hemisphere.

Did they really think we would have a chance to beat Hillary with "Hillary-lite?"


There was a tier-one candidate that stood for our goals of life and marriage – that man was Gov. Mike Huckabee. Had we nominated Huckabee to run against Hillary, the stark difference between the two would have brought voters out in droves. And we never would have seen the Supreme Court appointments of Charles Schumer and Diane Feinstein. If only there were a way to go back in time to change … I've gotta go. The guard spotted me writing again.

I don't know about you all, but I am practically speechless. I do know one thing, however.

If I ever write a follow-up to Holy Bullies and Headless Monsters, Janet Folger will be included.

She is eclipsing our other friend, Porno Petey, in hilarity.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well I have to admit, she is talented. She has an insane persecution / martyr complex, but she is talented.

That's some of the more entertaining insanity I've read lately. Or ever.

And that ending line is to DIE for:

"… I've gotta go. The guard spotted me writing again."
__
And let's not forget the '08 primaries: "A vote for anyone other than Mike Huckabee is a vote for Satan."

S. said...

Janet needs to be hauled off in a straight jacket - or get laid. What drugs is she on, anyway?