Thursday, March 26, 2020

EXCLUSIVE- Gay Mafia categorically denies unleashing the coronavirus

Editor's note - It is very rare that this blog has an exclusive, so naturally I am honored that it was chosen for this endeavor. I have been asked by The Gay Mafia to convey the following with regards to allegations made about the LGBTQ community and the coronavirus. You can tell that is is an official Gay Mafia press release based upon the gorgeous letterhead, which no doubt took someone a great deal of personal time to create:

Dear Friends,

It has come to our attention that certain allegations have been made against LGBTQ people. We would like to state that these allegations are categorically false. LGBTQ people did not plan nor are responsible for the Coronavirus.

Furthermore, we possess notes of our last 20 meetings which will disprove these allegations. These notes clearly prove that with all of the work we put into rigging the Oscars for Renee Zellweger, upgrading our recruitment program via Drag Queen Story Hour, and developing the pheromones which led Pete Buttigieg to grow a beard, we simply lacked the time and manpower to unleash a virus on the world.

 Any further questions can be given to our secretary, St Paul Charles.

 Yours in Queerness,

 Gay Mafia, esq.

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