The return of an old adversary

Ever since I started my blog, this person has been missing. It was unfortunate too because I was hoping to focus at least one post about him.

But he is back now and I am kinda happy.

Robert Knight of the group Concerned Women for America is probably the most ostentatious member of the anti-gay industry. He lacks Peter LaBarbera's verbal immaturity, Lou Sheldon's visual meanness and Fred Phelps' basic lunacy.

In other words, he is incredibly genial. But he is probably the most vitriolic spokesperson in the anti-gay industry. With a pleasant smile on his face, Knight has said some of the most ugly things about the gay community, like the following:

"If you look at the footage from Operation Rescue, um, vigils outside abortion clinics, you will see that the anti Operation Rescue demonstrators invariably have a pink triangle on and they are usually pretty big heavy set women who look like they’ve been over working October Fest for the last six years . . ." - Reclaiming America For Christ Conference, "Homosexuality" panel, February 28, 1999

Where has Mr. Knight been for the past months? I don't know, but apparently he is attempting to make up for lost time by speaking out on two issues affecting the gay community and pulling no punches in his zeal to malign us:

Knight believes homosexual activists and their supporters realize that the homosexual lifestyle is so empty and devoid of meaning that the best they can do is to continue shocking people. - (http://www.wdcmedia.com/newsArticle.php?ID=2327)

You've got the NHL, which is the epitome of masculinity, being used to try to validate first the homosexual relationship and then extending it to transgenderism," Knight asserts. However, the culture and media analyst suggests, this is typical of the tactics used in liberal activism. - (http://headlines.agapepress.org/archive/11/292006f.asp)

I really shouldn't be so hard on Bobby, because I actually had the pleasure of meeting him in 2004 when he came to the University of South Carolina to take part in a debate. I say pleasure because I was able to question him directly on some of his claims about the gay community.

Our encounter is covered in the first chapter of my upcoming book and serves as a template as to how the anti-gay industry knowingly exploits the beliefs of people of faith.

I will reveal one thing about Mr. Knight though.

When I asked about the usage of Paul Cameron's junk studies, his exact words to me were "yes we have used his research, so what?"

I then listed several of Cameron's deceptions and bad research tactics. Knight refused to talk me further, telling me that I need to stop asking him questions because (exact words again) I was "obsessed with Paul Cameron."

So Robert Knight knowingly uses bad studies to malign the gay community, but I am unhealthily obsessed because I want him to own up to it.

Oh yeah! Welcome back Mr. Knight.

My guilty pleasure

I can't begin to tell you how tiring this process of completing my book is. The thing that makes it bad a lot of the times is having to go on sites like Concerned Women for America or Americans for Truth and read all of the lies put out about us.

But I have learned to embrace something that makes things easier.

As a child of the South, one of my guilty pleasures is pro wrestling. Yeah I know it's fake but the love of that sport entertainment has been instilled in me since I was a little boy.

I have a huge collection of wrestling tapes from the older days, when the men were ugly and the women didn't know what silicon meant, and I watch them constantly. I make it a point to watch them specifically when I have to go trolling on one of those anti-gay sites.

And no, I don't have dreams of body slamming Peter LaBarbera or dropkicking Lou Sheldon; although I did meet Robert Knight (Concerned Women for America) once and seeing that I was taller than him, a Little Rascal short subject in which Spanky wished for a bully to be his height so that he could jump him came to mind.

But I digress.

I grew up watching pro wrestling and not only that, I can remember family outings in which we all went downtown and rooted for our favorite wrestlers and shouted at the ones we hated.

I liked those times best of all and maybe that's why I can work better on my book whenI have a wrestling tape in the VCR. It reminds me of the things I am fighting for; the true belief that being a gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender does not mean you have to surrender your dreams of comfort, love, or decency.

That realizing your orientation has no bearing on your ability to have a family. And finally you do not have to reduce your basic human needs to that of carnal desires.

The anti-gay industry tells us that we are devoid of love other than that of a physical sense.

That's a lie. And not buying into that lie will be the thing that will ultimately save us.

Sex education and other things . . .

Thanksgiving is over and the Christmas season is here. I am happy to report that Operation Save America's boycott of Wal-Mart was a big bust. From what I understand, they only boycotted in a few places and many were not responsive to their message.

They didn't even bother to boycott at any Wal-Mart in South Carolina, which I am kinda upset about. This state seems to always miss the fun.

Now the Christmas season is here, which means it is time for the phony "War on Christmas," brought to you by the anti-gay industry in yet another attempt to spin a conspiracy theory that "nameless, Godless hordes" are attempting to take the "Christ" out of Christmas.

For a good perspective on what utter nonsense this is, I turn to my friend Joe Brummer - (http://joebrummer.com/WordPress/)

Now in Maryland, there is a situation that has been taking place for a long time regarding objections to sex education. The Washington Blade gives a good cover to this story - (http://www.washblade.com/2006/11-24/news/localnews/curriculum.cfm)

But to make a long story short, it is basically the same problem when it comes to sex education and homosexuality. Anti-gay industry groups do everything they can to see that homosexual orientation is either not covered in sex education classes or covered in a way that they see fit, which generally is:

homosexuality is a "dangerous lifestyle" that should be avoided because gay men have lots of anal sex and it causes them to get diseases, take drugs, and engage in all sorts of evil behavior.

In this particular case, anti-gay industry members have helped some form a group called Citizens for a Responsible Curriculum.

CRC is yet another group attempting to force their negative view of the gay community on others. A good look at their resource page tells the entire story - (http://www.mcpscurriculum.com/resources_related_links.shtml)

The grubby hands of our friend Peter LaBarbera and other assorted so-called "pro family" groups are there. Some of their links are filled with errors. For example:

A. 15 Good Reasons to Oppose ‘Sexual Orientation’ (Homosexuality) Codes in Schools.

This piece, linked from the CRC webpage is from our friend Peter LaBarbera. Even the title is a distortion. No school operates a "sexual orientation" code. I am not even certain that this phrase even exists. From the onset, it is plainly seen that LaBarbera is engaging in propaganda and fear tactics. This is further demonstrated when one reads the piece.

His first point is a distortion:
"Homosexual behavior is wrong (and illegal in some states) . . ."

The first problem with this is that LaBarbera has not established what exactly is "homosexual behavior." Secondly, he is incorrect about the legality of it. Clearly LaBarbera is leading the reader to think that "homosexual behavior" is a description involving solely sexual behavior. His piece was written in 2002 (before Lawrence vs. Texas) made sodomy laws illegal. But even if somehow Lawrence vs. Texas had ruled the other way, his assertion of homosexual behavior being illegal is incorrect. Most of the sodomy laws had to do with sexual acts, heterosexual or homosexual, and not whom the acts were being committed with.

LaBabera continues his distortions with point two:
"Homosexual actions are unhealthy - especially for males. Like smoking, alcohol, and drug abuse, they should be discouraged. Dangerous behavior that shortens a person’s life should never be promoted to impressionable students."

Again, LaBarbera does not give a description of what exactly are "homosexual actions," leading the reader to think that "homosexual actions" can only be defined by sexual behavior by two people of the same gender. Also, his second point regarding "homosexual actions" shortening a person’s lifespan is an out and out distortion. No legitimate researcher has ever said that homosexuality shortens someone’s lifespan. The Centers for Disease Control has gone on record saying that they have never conducted studies saying that homosexuality "shortens" someone’s lifespan. - The Washington Blade, June 17, 2005

The only two sources LaBarbera and his groups can cite comes from a distorted Oxford study (http://ije.oupjournals.org/cgi/content/full/30/6/1499) and a discredited researcher by the name of Paul Cameron (remember him). Among other things, Cameron had his membership in the American Psychological Association taken away because he was found guilty of distorting the work of other researchers.

The rest of LaBarbera’s piece is just pure propaganda. He throws out incredibly bizarre hypothetical situations but does not quantify them with proof as to whether or not they will ever take place.

This is the caliber of "responsible curriculum" that CRC wants to force on Maryland.

Boycott dropped?

The word of the day is that the American Family Association has dropped their boycott of Wal-Mart. Apparently Wal-Mart has made some sort of promise to the AFA.

However, it is obvious that Wal-mart's promise to AFA to "avoid unrestricted donations that might be used for causes Wal-Mart did not endorse" is just a ridiculous conglomeration of words that really doesn't change the store's position. (http://www.localnewswatch.com/benton/stories/index.php?action=fullnews&id=28303)

That lovingly radical group, Operation Save America is obviously still not happy. (http://www.christiannewswire.com/news/384701564.html)

Take a tip, Operation Save America. Obviously AFA realized that it was biting off more than it could chew and is trying to exit this situation gracefully.

It's not working but still, it's nice to watch.

God and Us

I wish all of my readers all of the joy and happiness this Thanksgiving season.

I also want to give you all food for thought.

One of the most dangerous lies that is spread by the anti-gay industry is the idea that God disapproves of our community.

Supposedly we are an abomination and a stench in His nostrils.

What nonsense.

It took me years to reach my point of clarity regarding my God and my sexual orientation. I know the Biblical verses by heart that supposedly condemns homosexuality and I know what has been said publicly.

I, like so many of us, have gone through the wringer wondering whether or not God hates me. I have wondered many times that if God hates homosexuals, then why did he make me one.

It all stopped one day when I did something I should have done from the start.

I simply asked him.

Part of the problem with religion, particularly Christianity in the United States, is that it is conducted like a typing class.

In typing class, the location of the alphabet keys are drilled into your head until you could reach them without looking at them.

Like typing class, Christianity is done the same way.

We follow a set of rituals until they are drilled in our head. We are told not to question what we are being taught. But how can you have answers to questions without asking?

I think we lose perspective when it comes to who we are supposed to ask. The pastor of your church don’t have the answers. God does.

It is He who we should ask.

I think that when we let others, be it the pastor of a church, a family member, or a televangelist, tell us what God thinks, we are just setting ourselves up for a fall.

My homosexuality taught me to have a closer relationship with God. Dealing with my sexual orientation forced me to close out all other voices who was telling me what God felt about me because only He could give me the correct answer.

And he told me that I am His creation and delightful in His sight.

So when someone throws the Good Book at you, do what I did.

Consult the original author.

Gay Penguins and evolution

It's been a madhouse around here as I work to complete my book. Apparently I am going to have to copy edit myself as the nearest copy editor will charge me up to $200, which wouldn't be a problem except that I have no budget.

Also, this is Thanksgiving week, so all minds are geared to traveling and such. However, I did notice something interesting about a recent incident.

In Illinois, some parents aren't happy about a library book that centers on two male penguins taking care of an egg and the offspring that comes from it. To make them even more angry, school officials are reluctant to remove the book from the shelves. (http://www.gay.com/news/article.html?navpath=/channels/families&date=2006/11/20/2)

Apparently the book is talking about a natural occurence in the animal kingdom and the parents are all geared up to think its "dirty gay sex." Bear in mind, the penguins aren't having sex or anything like that; they are just taking care of an abandoned egg.

What is so interesting about this are the comments I have read regarding the article. I went on Huffington Post and read a few of them. Of course there are some whining about "homosexual indoctrination" and the like.

But the comments that impressed me were from gays who are raising children and felt that there is nothing wrong with book or their families. I liked the way they stood up for themselves with dignity and resolve.

It got me thinking because I remember a time when gays raising families was not talked about or even considered. I remember a time when realizing that you were gay meant whatever dreams you had of raising a family would eliminated from your life's goals.

And you know what? I am pretty damned proud of my people. We are evolving. Many of us are no longer falling for the lie that if you are gay, your life is over or that you are doomed to a selfish hedonistic existence.

Many of us are not falling for the illusion that if you are gay, then you are disqualified from the normal basic functions of humanity; those being civility, love, dignity, and a desire to make a positive impact on the world

Of course we have a long way to go and people like Lou Sheldon and Peter LaBarbera won't make it easy for us, but we are strong and resilient.

And most of all, we have God on our side.

So I guess I am saying that in this Thanksgiving season, I am not only proud of being gay, but I am also proud of my lgbt brothers and sisters.

And I can't wait to see what the future holds for us.

Reaping benefits of helping yourself

I spoke to my publisher today and my book is on deck for sometime in May/June 2007.

This entire progress has been tiring and I have gone through many "changes" so to speak. As this two-year odyssey of writing and publishing my first book comes to an end, I am been having a few epiphanies. These epiphanies are also because of the recent passage of the anti-marriage equality amendment in my state of South Carolina, something I fought to prevent.

While I have been writing this book, I have received some support from those who understand why a book like this is important.

Unfortunately, there have also been some who cannot understand why the gay community needs to chart and record the distortions of the anti-gay industry. This is the set of people I like to call "old school."

When I say "old school," I mean those activists who think that anything that causes attention to our cause is a good thing. They seem to be stuck in past, where tactics of direct action was appropriate. During those times, loudly bringing attention to our causes was needed.

But now is the time for pragmatism and planning, building our base, and giving our community spiritual and psychological boosts against the slings and arrows of ignorance some throw against us.

It is also time that we distinguish between the purveyors of anti-gay propaganda and those who fall for their lies. We should confront people like Lou Sheldon and organizations like Focus on the Family with dignity and control of our image. Our fight is not against those who think that homosexuality is a sin, but with those who exploit those beliefs.

With that in mind, the following is a draft of the back cover of my upcoming book. Feel free to tell me what you think:

Why do the Traditional Values Coalition continue to use studies against the gay community that it has acknowledged as being incorrect?

Why did Robert Knight, James Kennedy, and other religious conservatives cite a Netherlands study to make the case against same sex marriage even though the study had nothing to do with marriage at all?

Why do religious conservative pundits continue to claim that gay men have short line spans, even though their claim has been refuted several times, including by the originators of a study they continue to cite?

Why have several researchers and professors gone on record claiming that religious conservatives either distort their original work or take their findings out of context?

Why do religious conservative groups continue to cite the work of Paul Cameron, even though he has been censured and rebuked by several legitimate organizations including the American Psychological Association?

In their attempts to prove the worst about the gay community, so-called “pro-family” groups have created a house of pseudo-scientific studies made up of distortions, lies, and legitimate studies taken out of context.

These studies are then pushed by fake experts and Ph.D.s and repeated by conservative columnists and ignorant people of faith all willing to sacrifice their integrity on the altar of an alleged higher calling.

For the very first time, a book analyzes these deceptive tactics of Concerned Women for America, the Traditional Values Coalition, the American Family Association, and other so-called “pro family” groups as they not only demonize the American gay community but exploit the beliefs of people of faith.

Support Wal-Mart

No, I am not getting a cut of proceeds from advising you all to support Wal-Mart.

I have a more practical reason to ask you this.

Apparently some anti-gay organizations are all up in arms because the store has not only "dared" to support the gay community but is also selling items that cater to the gay community (http://www.savewalmart.com/):

"On August 21, 2006, the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce” (NGLCC) announced a “partnership” with Wal-Mart Stores, Inc.

Wal-Mart is now a corporate member” of the NGLCC.

Wal-Mart gave a one time $25,000 gift to join the NGLCC.

A Wal-Mart vice-president will serve as an advisor to NGLCC.

Wal-Mart will now sponsor (pay for) some programs of the NGLCC."

Oh the horror!

All Wal-Mart is doing is catering to a segment of the buying public. And we, the gay community, are a segment of the buying public.

But according to groups like Operation Save America:

"Wal-Mart is being blackmailed by the abortion industry and the radical homosexual agenda. That’s right! After being lambasted for years by the anti-family, pro-abortion, pro-homosexual, radical left, Wal-Mart is caving in. This former “family friendly store” is bowing to, and being extorted by, the demands of those who hate God, marriage, family, children, and America!"

There they go again with the conspiracy theory and the dire consequences technique (see yesterday's post.)

I am all for people not shopping at Wal-Mart because they disagree with the store's policy but that is not the case here. This boycott is not to improve worker conditions or store conditions, but to make Wal-mart adhere to their moral code.

Apparently these groups (and our friend Peter LaBarbera has a small hand in the circus) have picked November 24th, the day that Christmas shopping really starts, to put their campaign in full blast.

What their campaign means is more lies. In other words, if it even seems like Wal-Mart is not making as much money over the Christmas shopping season as the store has predicted, these groups are going to take credit for it.

I personally think that our community should go out of our way to support Wal-Mart if the store is truly going to bat for us. And not just Wal-Mart. If anyone or any store is willing to take a hit for us, then we should show some level of support.

As luck would have it, my mother's birthday is on November 24th. Thanks to Operation Save America and our friend Peter LaBarbera, she will be receiving something besides a cash gift of $50.

She will be receiving a nice set of gifts from Wal-Mart.