2009 Holy Bullies and Headless Monsters Misinformers of the Year Awards

Thanks to an ugly seasonal thing and a small bout with depression (my early mid-life crisis is approaching along with my 39th birthday), I am now presenting the 2009 Holy Bullies and Headless Monsters Misinformers of the Year Awards a bit later than usual.

And to me, it's not necessarily a bad thing. It seems that everyone else has already brought out their best (and worst) lgbt moments of the year so my lateness gives me an opportunity to talk about incidents occurring this year which may have been obscured via all the attention hogged by other situations (i.e. the Maine vote and other battlegrounds over marriage equality.)

Don't get me wrong. Marriage equality is an important issue but it is not THE issue in regards to the lgbt community or lgbt equality in general.

So let me get on with it:

In this crop of awards, I followed the spirit of the Grammys and pre-announced at least one award before the official Year End Awards post.

And of course that award for Anti-Gay Video of the Year went to the National Organization for Marriage for that lovely "Gathering Storm" hot mess commercial.

The "Enjoyable Train Wreck" Award  - All of those lovely individuals who testified futilely against the passage of marriage equality in Washington, D.C.  You have to give it to these folks who let their zaniness out for the whole world to see.

There was Brian Brown of the National Organization for Marriage, former legislator Walter Fauntroy, and my two favorite:

There is the one I call Sista Hot Mess:



But she doesn't get the prize. That special bobby belongs to activist Ruth Jacobs, who spends too much time talking about "the anus:"




The "Laying of Hands" Award - Remember Manifested Gloried Ministries? That's the African-American church which tried to exorcise a "homosexual demon" from the 16-year-old young man? Words aren't necessary when one views the clip.
Except for maybe why couldn't that have been me and Phillip Seymour Hoffman. I'm all for laying of hands on him:



"I Don't Care How Much He Smiles, He Still Creeps Me Out" Award - Richard Cohen. I immensely enjoyed how Rachel Maddow just tore Cohen apart in assessing his role in Uganda's pushing an anti-gay bill. But one thing stays with me. Throughout the entire thing, Cohen had that same eerie smile. In fact, I have rarely seen a photo of him without that same eerie smile. It looks as if he is an infant with a pleasant case of gas:



Forget Peter LaBarbera, Matt Barber, and the rest. Cohen is the spookiest member of the religious right.

"Why Don't They Just Be Quiet" Award - tie - Perez Hilton and Carrie Prejean

Perez Hilton - Come on guys, we simply must be honest. This entire mess with Carrie Prejean started because Perez Hilton couldn't keep his mouth shut. So what if Prejean gave that answer (which I certainly didn't agree with it). Did Hilton have to exacerbate the situation by going on video and calling her foul names?

The only reason why Prejean lost control of the situation was because of her blatant hypocrisy and inability to comprehend the forces using her.

And of course that brings me to Carrie Prejean,  the flawed beauty queen, co-winner of this award, and a female who knows a good opportunity when it comes to her by way of a media blogger with a big mouth.

At first, Prejean elicited a lot of sympathy because it did seem that Hilton was picking on her and (let's face reality), she's blond and seemingly perky. Perky blond women seem to be, for some reason, highly popular in America.

The religious right also knew a golden opportunity when they saw one too.

They compared her to Esther, which really should have offended Christians.

Esther was a Jewish queen who saved her people from genocide by the Persians.

All Prejean did was answer a question.

I fail to see the similarities.

But then came her alliance with the National Organization for Marriage in violation of  Miss California duties,

the news about her church's appreciation for Paul Cameron's discredited work,

the dirty pictures (which for some reason has caused a recent explosion of hits on my site),

the boob job,

the nasty attitude she showed pageant officials,

the alleged racy video,

the bizarre meltdown on the Larry King show:



and the subsequent cancellation of her book tour.

Miss Prejean's popularity descended so fast that I hear the homeless won't read her book in the public library.

"Don't Cry for Me Argentina" Award - Mark Sanford for his diligence in making marriage safe for a man, his wife, and his Argentinian mistress. How dare lgbts want to get in on the action. Seriously though folks, seeing that Sanford is my state's governor, you just know that I was going to mention him.

By the way, Sanford also receives the "You Are So Lucky that Jenny didn't have a friend who told her to cut you" Award as well as the "You Were Smart Not To Bring Your Ass Home" Award.

And speaking of South Carolina legislators, state representatives Greg Delleney and Joan Brady get the "Good Idea Marred by Homophobia" Award.

In May of last year, a bill was introduced in the SC Legislature that that required schools to create teen dating violence prevention policies. Brady sponsored the bill. Delleney created an amendment requiring the bill to pertain to only heterosexual relationships.

Delleney said that he was afraid that the bill without the amendment would "force" schools to teach about same-sex relationships.

Oh we couldn't have that. Anyway, because of this ridiculous amendment, a bunch of us raised hell, held a press conference at the State House, and the bill was defeated.

Granted, not to many people nationwide really gave a damn or cared to remember this incident because apparently us Southerners are naturally ignorant and homophobic so who cares what we think anyway.

But hey, like country singer Kacey Jones, I'm not bitter.

And now the big award, the mega award - The 2009 Holy Bullies and Headless Monsters Misinformer of the Year.

First a little history.

In 1978 when the album Saturday Night Fever won the Grammy for Best Album, almost 40 people took to the stage to claim the trophy because so many people worked on the album

In that same spirit, the 2009 Holy Bullies and Headless Monsters Misinformer of the Year goes to a group effort.

The award goes to the folks at BigGovernment, Gateway Pundit, Mass Resistance, Michelle Malkin, Sean Hannity, the Washington Times, Accuracy in Media, and the rest of the insane right-wing for their past and continued attacks on Obama appointee Kevin Jennings.

All of them had something to do with the slurring, smearing, and the near destruction of this man's reputation.

Mercy, where do I start with this one? Who knew that the words "Fistgate" would become so repeated when Mass Resistance drudged it out of its fevered anti-lgbt imagination in 2000?

Just what exactly did Jennings do to these people? Spread rumors about their mothers.

They have accused him of supporting pedophiles. That wasn't true.

They have accused him of teaching children to "fist." That wasn't true.

They have accused him and GLSEN of trying to get children to read explicit material. That wasn't true.

They have accused him and GLSEN of encouraging children to go to leather bars. That wasn't true.

They have accused him and GLSEN of encouraging children to have public sex in parks with strangers. That wasn't true.

They have accused him of allowing the abuse of an underaged child. That wasn't true.

They accused him of actually being a pedophile. That wasn't true.

They even accused him of advocating murder. And that wasn't true.

I don't think people realized just how vital it was that these lies did not cause Jennings to lose his position. If it had, it would have been yet another scalp for folks eager to undermine President Obama after the Van Jones resignation.

It would have driven an even bigger wedge between Obama and some members of the lgbt community (yes even bigger than the one he supposedly has now - when one eliminates the opinions of lgbts of color).

Most of all, it would have created a potential Sword of Damocles over the head of every future lgbt Presidential appointee. 

The fact that Jennings has survived is not a miracle, but a product of good work via organizations like Media Matters  and Think Progress who beat down every lie before it had to time gain power.

Well that's that. May we all have an excellent 2010.

Time for my seasonal thing medication. This dose is wearing off.